Monthly Archives: January 2008

I’m still here

Hello people of the world. Or those who read this – which is probably not many really.

Been a bit busy this last week and not been in the mood to write down my thoughts. Here I am anyway.

Ok well at the weekend, went home to Bristol. Vik’s birthday was on sunday but we had things planned for saturday night so I thought I’d make the most of being at home for a couple of days. Me and the parentals went out friday night for food. I love going out for dinner when I’m at home just because I hardly ever do when I’m here or if I do, it’s just to Whetherspoons or the union or something hardly very special.

Met in the Assembly sat night – I had previously been told it was a pink theme, so to wear something with pink on. As I dont even own anything pink, I nicked a top from the lil sister to wear out. When I got to the pub, most other people weren’t going by this theme but we did have loads of pink glittery cowboys hats for anyone who wanted one. We did get a lot of comments like ‘hen night’ thrown at us – understandable cus of the hats but my friends really do not look like slags even at the worst of times. From the pub, we went on into town and went in Reflex. It was possibly the first time I have been in there and not been asked for ID on the door. Maybe we’re starting to look like grown ups who are responsible. Wahey!

Anyway – great night in there, after we came out, lots of hanging about on the centre in the cold, firstly sorting out issues with someone’s ex who was being a bit prattish, and then trying to get a taxi who was happy to drive all over south bristol. There ended up being 6 of us so we split comfortably into 2 3’s and went our separate ways.

Quick question – why do some taxi drivers, when you say for example ‘how much to get to Knowle’, say I’m not going there/I can’t go that way? They go whereever you want to go, surely. They are a taxi!!! Just annoys me anyway. They seem to be allocated set places where they can drive and will not go further than a specific line.

On sunday, went for breakfast with parentals and various family friends. Beautiful food, little cafe in Bedminster which do loads of types of brekkie – I had full english, followed by toast and jam. Then me and mum went for a short walk around Stanton Drew which is a very small bronze age stone circle just outside bristol. Took some pictures, came back and packed my stuff up.

Didn’t get back in Plymouth until 9.00 in the evening on account of earlier train being cancelled. I have completely lost faith in rail travel. So much money – luckily I got two singles instead of return and it was an ok price but for what you get – rip off really. Even for a short arse like me, the leg room is nothing to write home about. I got on the later train but because of the earlier cancellation, it was completely packed from Bristol all the way back. I sat in the corridor bit between the doors with about 7 other people until Exeter. Actually I probably had more legroom out there, but not so comfy on the bum.

Anyway – that’s my weekend. I’m planning on working on dissertation 2moro – how much procrastination will I do?

Do human beings really have free will?

What is free will to begin with?

Is it having control over our decisions and how we behave in which case people who do not have free will are those many in prison or being held captive somewhere. If we carry on down this path – is our free will stopped by what we really cannoy do such as a baby has less free will before it can walk because even if it wants to walk, it doesn’t have the muscle strength yet to be able to support itself.

However, if free will includes control over our thoughts – yes we all have free will because no-one can control our own thoughts, they are completely internal. We can still challenge this for example when a person says don’t think of a black cat, then the more you try to do that, the more you think of a black cat. You don’t want to, you have no control over it, the mind’s natural impulse when you hear black cat is to think of it.

This led me to decide that maybe free will does not exist. Psychologists who says it does are challenging their own profession. Psychology exists to find out why people think and behave they way they do. All behaviour and everything we do is influenced by something, however strong. Even if you say ‘yes I chose to wear those clothes because I wanted to, no-one else told me what to do’ – we are always affected by other people’s opinions, social rules, our genes. Surely if everything is determined by something then true free will does not exist.

If free will does exist, then what is determinism? If we have free reign over what we do and we chose to do it because of our own internal decisions not strongly influenced by anything around us, then acting completely for other people and none of ourself or our personality is telling us to do this, that makes us puppets. And who is controlling these puppets – if we controlled each other, that must include free will.

Ha ha – hurt your brain now haven’t I?

Taking a module in consciousness is good for the old grey matter I find.


Apparently it’s national rabbit week.

Because of that here’s a picture of my old bunny Daisy


Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans

Hello everyone in blogland. A cheery hello to everyone who’s feeling down, sad, bored or just a bit mondayish today. Stick a smile on your face and thank god it’s nearly over.

I slept ok last night. I went to bed about 11.30 which is my usual “bedtime”, altho I don’t like that word. It sounds like I’m my own parent or something.

I had to get up for 9.00 this morning which I did. I don’t like the monday morning lecture. It’s a rather boring topic but I went anyway as usual. I came back to the house straight after, did some notes on dissertation and transferred bits of journals and bits of my own experimental design onto one document. Twiddled about on t’internet for a bit and procrastinated. Yes.. Facebook – how did you guess?

I had a lecture at 4.00 so wandered back over, I actually almost look forward to this one because it’s a quite simple but interesting topic with a lecturer who knows his stuff and is quite interesting. However, I walked into the lecture theatre and glancing at a sign on the board found that the lecture was cancelled due to illness. How annoying!

I didn’t really have any other plans so slowly meandered back through the park taking some pictures. I found one daffodil out plus some small yellow flowers which were pretty. Despite them looking very pretty sticking up out of the grass, the pictures didn’t come out that well – I think because it was windy and they were moving.

This whole 365 – one picture each day of the year lark is quite difficult sometimes. Now and again I’ll go out for a walk or something happens where I can lots of pictures which I think are really good. The problem is I run out of inspiration. I want every picture I take to be the best one like it but sometimes nothing out of the ordinary happens, and on the route between uni and my house, I feel there is nothing that interesting to make a good photo. I need to get into a more picture taking mindset where I can see photo opportunities in more than just plants, animals, sea, views, sunsets. Although some of the best photos are sometimes down to a fluke. Maybe I need more confidence in myself.


Ok I can’t seem to sleep very well. Ok some housemates are to blame – especially those who have a new boyfriend and are in the room next to you. I’m happy for them, but do they have to chat until 3am. It’s annoying.

I find that once I’ve woken up and its about 3-5am ish I seem to them be wide awake. I was awake last night for a quite a while listening to housemates coming in from night out and going to bed (or not). Once it was all quiet I decided to go to the loo and noticed half the lights were all on so – being me – had to go and switch them off. I got back into bed and ended up watching QI episodes on youtube until I got sleepy again. Stephen Fry’s voice is so relaxing so it does work. I got back to sleep around half 6 ish and didn’t walk up until 11.00. The problem is I woke up not feeling at all rested and wanting to go back to sleep but my mind knows it’s the middle of the day and I wont get back to sleep.

Hopefully I’ll have a peaceful night tonight as its sunday. I have 9.00 start tomorrow hmmph. Not keen on monday mornings.

Fast thinking walk..

is one of the things I did today. Day off today.. well ok I shouldn’t call it off – just no lectures. I should really be doing work or notes or getting on with dissertation but didn’t feel like it.

Did a bit of washing – clothes and dishes – this morning. When it stopped raining, I walked down to the hoe and round the seafront. It was lovely when the sun was out. It did almost start raining a few times and there was a lovely rainbow as I was walking back down. Felt rather well exercised when I got back to the house.

Been chillin a bit this evening. Just caught up on first episode of series 2 of Kingdom. Addicted to that show, I can’t believe I didn’t realise it had started again but I suppose only got to wait till sunday for next episode.

Torchwood starts tonight!!! – can’t wait for that although it’s sort of the opposite end of the scale to Kingdom.

That was a bit of a boring blog… I’m trying to keep to blogging regularly just to update but maybe I need to work on writing more interesting entries. I’ll have a think.

New word…

Apparently a new word coming into comming usage is the word ‘ideate’ – meaning basically to form an idea.

I bet ya didn’t know that eh…

Other news – not done a lot. Cooked some nice bolognesey chilli tomatoey stuff with taglitele for me dinner. Was yummy.